This is a third installment in a series on the lessons I learnt from the women who raised me at one point or the other. You will soon notice that there is an overlap on some of the lessons, and as I highlight what I learnt from each one of them, it does not mean that’s all there is to learn about them. It is a summary of my observation about them and what I particularly learnt from them. The third person who played a role in my upbringing is my auntie Elina Kambanji.
A heart to help people
Mrs. Kambanji is mum’s elder sister and second born in their family. She in many ways was a mother to many when growing up. She opened up her home to her younger siblings and their children at different times throughout their growing years. There was always someone in the Kambanji’s home that they kept. Even the workers became family. Some of them even helped with education and eventually getting a job. In fact, we nicknamed them the Lombados after a famous Mexican soap opera that was popular in the 90’s on national television. The Lombados were wealthy people living in a mansion with a lot of relatives. The Kambanji’s residence was definitely like the Lombado’s residence in that regard, full of people.
High levels of tolerance
My dear aunt is a live wire! That is to say, she is not shy to speak her mind, and as you would expect she has over the years rattled quite a number of people just as she has equally been rattled as well. When you think of the things she has been told, and the names she has been called over the years by both young and old, intentionally or unintentionally, you would expect that she would hold grudges for life, but alas, she has developed a thick skin over the years and has learnt to move on or better yet to be tolerant. On several occasions, she narrated an argument and laughed at the insults that were thrown at her!
Being industrious
When you think Mrs. Kambanji, busy comes to mind, not aimless busy but productive. She knows how to work with her hands and get things done. What is said of the woman in Proverbs 31:13-21 is probably the best description of her.
She seeks wool and flax, and works with willing hands. She is like the ships of the merchant; she brings her food from afar. She rises while it is yet night and provides food for her household and portions for her maidens. She considers a field and buys it; with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard. She dresses herself with strength and makes her arms strong. She perceives that her merchandise is profitable. Her lamp does not go out at night. She puts her hands to the distaff, and her hands hold the spindle. She opens her hand to the poor and reaches out her hands to the needy. She is not afraid of snow for her household, for all her household are clothed in scarlet.
The sanctity of marriage
The Kambanjis have been married for 39 years. That’s almost 4 decades of unbroken marriage. In a family of a few faithful marriages, these two have stood as a pillar and an example to many of what an enduring marriage looks like. They have lived out the vows “for better or for worse, in health and in sickness, for richer and for poorer…” and they are still going and that without scandals. Although they are from the older generation one thing that particularly stands out is their oneness and closeness. Their marriage is unlike most where the right hand does not know what the left hand is doing. It is actually quite hilarious to hear them narrate their escapades even in their old age. What a breath of fresh air! The is a lot couples can learn from the Kambanji's.
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